Week 5 NFL Picks: Berman Style

Full Disclosure: It’s been a busy week of service at work for me. As a result, this week will have to be the “Chris Berman” version of NFL picks. Next week, I plan to return with some, hopefully, more articulate reasons for my picks. All the same, enjoy!

Tier 1: Rumblin’ (Season Record: 4-5)

Chiefs +1 over Bucs

Bills -3 over Ravens

Chargers -5.5 over Texans

It’s honestly stunning to me that the Chiefs are getting points in this game. I know Mike Evans is coming back for Tampa Bay, but still did anyone watch this Bucs offense? Plus, with Hurricane Ian’s devastation, we still don’t know where this game is being played. Betting on the Chiefs to bounce back is so much safer. Likewise, Buffalo will bounce back this week. The Bills main issue right now is the injuries to their defensive secondary. The Ravens main issue right now is just their secondary. Also, this will likely be the game of the week so make the time to watch it. The Chargers did get blown out by the Jaguars last week, but this is a reborn Jacksonville team. Plus, Herbert will be healthier this week and should get Keenan Allen back.

Tier 2: Bumblin’ (Season Record: 3-6)

Dolphins +3.5 over Bengals

Browns -1.5 over Falcons

Broncos +2.5 over Raiders

Thursday night is going to be fun! Joe Burrow might be returning back to form but this Dolphins team is good. Nick Chubb and Kareem Hunt should be successful against this Falcons defense. Myles Garrett may be out after a nasty car accident, but if there’s a week to be without your star pass rusher Atlanta isn’t a bad one to miss. The Broncos still have plenty of offensive problems, but their pass rush is nasty and the Raiders’ offensive line is awful.

Tier 3: Stumblin’ (Season Record: 5-7)

Jaguars +6.5 over Eagles

Cardinals +1.5 over Panthers

Packers -9.5 over Patriots

49ers -1.5 over Rams à Mid-column swap: Rams +1.5 over 49ers

Can something be “back” if it never was? How about we just say the Jaguars have arrived! The Eagles are good but they are laying too many points. I still refuse to buy the Panthers, maybe it will continue to cost me money. The Packers seem like the team to drum bad teams and struggle against good teams, plus Romeo Doubs has broken out. The 49ers have been a disappointment and Jimmy G didn’t look good on Sunday night, especially after Trent Williams went down. You know what? I’m actually flipping my pick. Take the Rams.

Tier 4: Fumblin’ (Season Record: 4-5)

Vikings -2.5 over Saints

Lions -4.5 over Seahawks

Steelers -3 over Jets

Betting on the London game is for people with too much money and degenerates. I’m certainly not the former, and I’m hopefully not the latter…yet. Don’t bet this game, but if you have to take the Vikes. The Lions will be without D’Andre Swift, but Jamaal Williams stepped up last week and the Seahawks defense isn’t good. The Jets suck.

Tier 5: Whoops! (Season Record: 5-4)

Titans +3.5 over Colts

Giants -3 over Bears

Cowboys -3 over Commanders

Titans bounced back last week and the Colts might only be good against the Chiefs. The Bears are bad. The Giants are too, but they are less bad. I think? I refuse to bet on the Commanders.

Season Record: 21-27

Prop Record: 1-3

Cover Photo Courtesy of ESPN Images

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